Attitude

The definition of attitude on the internet is an established way of thinking or feeling about something.  A more informal definition is to have a slightly rude way about you.  This blog focuses on the first definition and on how changing your attitude can change your life.

Have you ever tried walking in a straight line with your head bowed down?  If you have, maybe in a snowy park or a sandy beach, you might've realised that a linear path is easier if you focus on a fixed goal.  When driving on a narrow country lane, with traffic going both ways, it is tempting to look at oncoming vehicles as you drive.  Good drivers will, however, focus on their side of the road because inevitably, you will end up moving towards what you stare at.

The same is true in life.  My ability to reframe situations that I had no control over, was a game changer for keeping me sane.  For instance, when it rains, most people in the U.K. moan, but I found a bible verse that says, "The heavens also poured down rain at the presence of God". Psalm 68:8.  Physical pain, although managed through diet and medication, was ultimately viewd as my body's request for rest.  Having allergic reactions to insect bites was regarded as my being sensitive, as opposed to sickly; and in my teaching career, students with fine/gross motor dysfunction due to dyspraxia, were spoken of as having gentle hands.  I've almost turned it into a game to see how I can change as many of life's problems into challenges, and therefore opportunities to grow.

Mental toughness is the result of this approach.  It produces a character that is steadfast and consistent in the midst of trauma, grief and chaos.  Our world needs people like this.  We need political leaders who can think positively quickly and we require faith leaders who can adapt to the changing needs of the communities that they serve.  We need parents who view their teenagers as emerging from caterpillars into butterflies, and we need teachers who see students with special needs as superheroes.

We need this because without it, marginalised groups get pushed of the edge, into criminality, promiscuity and hopelessness.  In order to be each others' keepers, we need to be confident in how we view ourselves, and recognise that the key to our challenges often lies in our interconnectedness to others.  This means that when my problem is fixed, yours is too, eventually.  And when your problem is fixed, mine is too, eventually.  The process requires optimism, trust and patience.  And despite the curve balls that life throws at us, we are always  free to decide how we think about them.

This week, I challenge you to challenge yourself and see how many negatives you can reframe into a positive.  Start with your own thoughts, words and feelings before you  move onto your noisy neighbour, obnoxious colleague or rude children.  By starting the process in yourself, you should automatically see a knock-on effect of change in the people you interact with.  And even if you don't, you are sure to have a much more enjoyable and peace-filled week.

Dr. Monica

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