Marriage Preparation

Men and women will always be attracted to each other.  It's kinda in-built.  The Bible has a lot to say about how couples met and got married, but it has to be said that a lot of it was culturally relevant to their context.  Today, if I were to give any person advice, if they were dating and thinking about getting married, it would be to get counselling.  My kids laugh at me a lot, and one of the reasons is because whenever I see person with a problem, one of my go-to statements is, 'they need therapy'.  And I don't mean it in a bad way.  We've come a long way now from the days of 'only mad people need a shrink'.  Today, I hope that we recognise the value of sitting with a professional who can ask us probing questions and encourage us to explore our past, our motives and our values.  These are some of the points that I feel should be explored with a therapist, on an individual basis, before wedding preparations begin:

1. Adverse childhood experiences

2. Your relationships with your parents and siblings

3. Your personality traits

4. Your attitude towards money and economics

5. What your friends say about you

6. How you feel about yourself and your achievements

7. Your attitude towards child-rearing

8. Your communication style

9. Past responses to conflict and lessons learned

10. Your goals and ambitions for the future

This list isn't exhaustive, but 10 counselling sessions covering these points with a good therapist, should give you clarity about if the person you're with is your true mate or not, and should help you to decide if you are ready to take a step that will change your life forever.

💜

Dr. Monica is available to meet your learning organisation's training and consultancy needs. Contact her at vineacademy2024@gmail.com.

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